It's not that bad...
I am really looking forward to looking back on this time in about three months from now.
Right now, we don’t have a permit to sell in Madagascar, the government is asking for “special funds”, and I think at this point our project would be more than willing to pay, but it’s illegal.
The longer we operate without a permit, the more money we are waisting. A last resort solution is to shutdown. Not permanently, but until the permit issue is resolved.
I also have to be a little easier on myself. I am in “Week 5”. It’s been awhile since I’ve suffered the “week five” crazies, but if every anyone like, looses their mind, someone will ask, “What week is he in?”. If the answer is five, everyone nods their head sympathetically, ‘cause we’ve all been there.
The job here IS to fight and IS to push and IS frustrating. Thats why it comes with the “salary uplift”. It’s set out there right in front of everyone, “Look, we know that you’re going to be in a super weird, f*cked up, backwards, no-logic world - so here’s some money, now get to work!”. I’ve had this before. It’s just that I haven’t had it in a while, so I’m freaking out.
The, “Am I really cut out for expat life” always comes up in my mind and it’s annoying already. I’ve been doing it, I don’t want to quit, so obviously, I’m cut out for it. And not every day is a struggle. And I have some pretty cool rewards (ex: China trip with my mom in November).
If I was truly unhappy no amount of money in the world would keep me here (I’ve seen people that keep their jobs for money and they ARE MISERABLE). But I’m struggling. And freaking out that I’m struggling.
I think I’ll need to have a drink or two on Sunday. After I sleep in until at least….ten am.