Work Adjustment

Yesterday was a really tough day. At one point, I did give up. While I’m struggling learning this new “just do your reports and don’t try to fix everything”, it’s going to take some time.

I’m trying to stay focused, and there are constantly things pulling me in different directions. I’m trying to finish one thing, and ninety other things are calling for me. They are just as important (or more) as the one thing I’m trying to finish. But for now, I just have to have a plan and stick with it.

Since I’m a mega-list oriented person, I’ve started using to track and update my tasks. The tagging function requires premium access (which is $29/year) and in the last couple of weeks that I’ve had it, it has paid for itself.

Now, this whole second blog thing is getting old. I’d like to just unblock it, and monitor the Google Analytics. I had a suggestion to start using Google +, but I’m not sure if everyone is on that bandwagon yet. I’ve thought about using a Facebook page, but I’m not sure if the formatting will look nice. The fact that I’m running two blogs feels a bit narcisistic to me. Like, ooo, I’m so important that I need to write secret stuff…but still advertise it. Whatever. I’ll get over myself eventually.

So yesterday was pretty horrible. Last night was certainly horrible (I was so pissed off and worn out from work I didn’t even want to talk to Louis). But today feels like a new day. Today, although I’m still a little all over the place, it feels less shitty than yesterday. I’ve got SOME thing accomplished. Or near finished.

I know one of my “problem areas” is that I take things very personally. The fact that I’m not the most important thing in my boss’ life bugs me. Yup, I’m one of those people. I think the problems that I’m bringing up are big deals, and I want action taken. But, he’s one person. And, I’m one person. So unless the plant is going to explode in the next hour, my work, isn’t a priority. This will be re-evaluated once the whole “permit” issue is solved (if that ever happens). But until then, I have to back-off. I’ve been pretty good up until now, but this week I’ve been (rightfully) asking for more attention. I’ve discussed some pretty major things and I’ve presented plans so that I CAN make changes here - not just do my job. But it will take his help. And his time. And right now, there ARE more important things than me. And my “important” findings. And yes, the things I’m talking about are pretty major, but they’ve been screwed up for months or years, so putting them on the backburner for a couple more months isn’t going to make a big difference. I have to see that my main task is keeping him informed and up to date with the major risks going on. I can jump in here or there, but it’s not my job to fix everything. I might be repeating myself over and over…or maybe I’m not making any sense, but I’m tired and I’m happy because I’m having a so-so day, instead of a day where I lock myself in my office and go home feeling horrible.

Hope it stays this way for at least today and tomorrow