London - Joberg

Omg. I don't like big cities...but flying through them isn't so bad. But London? And Heathrow?

I wished I'd create my own version of an airport rating scale back in the day. Here's Healthrow's: 

Appearance: ok. Kinda old but in some parts remodelled. Easy train access to different terminals. 

Shops: Come back when you're a millionaire. This includes if you'd like to buy a book or a bottle of water. 

Coffee Shops: Have only seen Costa Coffee...which makes me think there are no Starbucks. 

Lounge access: I'm a lower Star Alliance class member...& this is a Gold Lounge. I'm not sure how I got in, but I'm glad I did. If nothing but to fill up my water bottle. Plus they have jacket potatoes with a topings bar. Pop comes in 65ml cans. Beer comes in 1L bottles. I have taken all the portable fruits and snacks that I can fit into my carry on. And ate some chili, which is certainly some great flying food. 

Hotel Access: it took me TWO hours, a train, and a shuttle to get to my hotel. I got a taxi on the way back for £12. (As a opposed to the £4.50 shuttle). 

On the way to the hotels, we passed by a  farmer's field, filled with garbage, A BATHTUB, and a really weird looking breed of horses. 

The hotel was glorious. But when I'm tired I get SO COLD. I had a nap wearing a sweatshirt, winter jacket, extra blanket, and the hotel towels. When I woke up, I didn't want to get out of bed. 

Now I'm on the airplane from London to Johanesburg. This flight is 11.5 hours. Its 02h41 and I land at 07h30 and we left at 20h00 JNB time. In that time I've had to wake up my poor neighbour FIVE times to pee. He's from Parksville and pretty friendly thankfully. 

I've watched two movies. On South African Airlines, all the movies are edited in a super funny way. 
The obvious F***, S***, and Damn are changed to simpler words. 
God is always bleeped out.
Schmuck is changed to Schmoe (?)
JC is changed to (in this movie anyway) Cheese Rice (the best one yet). 
My all time favorite is when Sandra Bullock insulted someone by saying, You're a spit sucking duck butt licker. I'm pretty sure it was significantly more explicit. I'm so tired I don't even know if explicit is the right word I'm looking for. 

I have the Cranberries song, Zombie, in my head. 

Man, Louis' gonna love flying back with me. ;)

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