2016 Resolutions


Well, one month into 2016 and I haven’t written once about my resolutions.

 

They are:

1.       Keep a gratitude journal

2.       Learn and practice self-acceptance

3.       Be open to love

4.       Start a travel fund

5.       Meet with a financial planner

6.       Move into a place that I love and can afford in July

7.       Spend less than $20/month on coffee/at cafe’s

8.       Practice compassion

 

Phew. Some pretty hefty resolutions....

 

 

 

1.       Keep a gratitude journal

Done and DONE!!! It’s actually an app that i downloaded on my phone, and every day there is a little reminder set to write down what I’m grateful for. Since being sick since January 4th and doing the divorce mambo, some days have been, “The really really good soup I ate for supper” was what I was grateful for. But I do it every night before I go to bed, and it FORCES me to think positive before I fall asleep. The app also lets me look back to the earlier entries...some are serious, some are moving, and some are ridiculous....

 

2.       Learn and practice self-acceptance

There are a few things that previously, I did not like about myself. One, that I’ve spoken pretty openly about, is my weight. And another big one is my sensitivity. I don’t know how to describe this. There are times where I present a strong exterior, and inside, I’m falling apart. There are other times where I just plain fall apart. I’ve beaten myself up for this trait for YEARS now. I should be STRONG and ALWAYS CONFIDENT and ALWAYS SELF ASSURED and not just a wimp. I should cry less and have be less sensitive to other’s comments.

 

While I agree that I have to work on taking comments less personally, I don’t have to work on being less sensitive. My sensitivity – whether I show it or not, is part of who I am. It’s a trait that is the same as my big nose or my green eyes. I can’t change this. I can manage my sensitivity in productive ways, but I shouldn’t chase it away. This is just ONE of the things that I’m working on....another post on my how I’ve learn to accept my weight to come. (And it’s a pretty big shocker!!!)

 

3.       Be open to love

Nope, nope, and nope. Nothing to add at this point.

 

4.       Start a travel fund

 

Well, I haven’t received my first paycheque yet (tomorrow), so i haven’t progressed on this resolution either.

 

5.       Meet with a financial planner

Will start looking for one this month.

 

6.       Move into a place that I love and can afford in July

July 1st in Quebec isn’t Canada Day, it’s Moving Day (I’m serious – Google it). I’ve already started looking and I have an idea of what neighborhood I’d like to live in, but it’s still a tiny bit too early. But I’ve put my name in and I’m starting to look at places this weekend.

 

7.       Spend less than $20/month on coffee/at cafe’s

JANUARY: FAIL

FEBRUARY: Well...yesterday I spent $16 at Starbucks. I’m just going to call it a FAIL

 

8.       Practice compassion

The theory here is that for me to be compassionate with myself, I have to be compassionate with others.

 

I don’t know. I’m confused. I thought I was practicing compassion with my ex….it failed miserably. I’d like to get back into reading and I have some fantastic Pema Chodron (a Buddhist nun) books on this very subject. I don’t think I’m particularly compassionate to myself. I think I’m pretty hard on myself, but getting a lot better.

 

I don’t want to blame the divorce process for everything....but it certainly has an effect on how I value myself, how I practice compassion, and obviously, how and if I’m open to love....

 

I hope that next month I have more to update, but I think I’m off to a pretty great start.

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