To You

I wonder if, after all the pieces have fallen, if you ever think of me fondly.

I remember the smallest of things. How you'd greet me, how it felt to fall asleep in your arms (& I'd often stay up to watch a show I knew would put me to sleep so I could do just that, your laugh when you thought something was mildly funny, your face when I knew you were trying to tease me.

I've been fighting those memories. This week's lesson is that they fight back, so it's best to just let them pass.

I worry about the girls. I worry about one of your brother's and your mom... Again...just trying to let those feelings exist and pass by.

I've written you countless emails, always to delete them before sending, knowing they'll do more harm than good.

My loneliest time is when I'm changing the sheets. It's so much easier to change the sheets with two people.

I wonder if your heart breaks....or if you're past that and at peace and happy. I hope that's the case. And that at least one of us is over this thing.

I wish you the very best. Always.

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