Just NB

Not even sure I was back to Canadian resident status... came back after a very impromtu vacation to Morocco and the Canary Islands. I had planned on staying in Tennerife....but after a huge meltdown my friends convinced me to head back to Canada. I lived with my cousin and his wife. In their basement. I took care of their dog, who gave me some soulful therapy. Miss that crazy dog.  I was so nervous to be with all of my family during Thanksgiving as it was my first family event post-breakup #1 (remember...my ex and I got back together the following January....). I didn't want to talk about anything about the breakup. I was scared if anyone said something that I would just fall apart.  Everything went perfect. I was with my family again.  I just can't figure out how that was only four years ago....and not ten...or fifteen..  I miss my grandpa every.single.day. 

Wow, two posts in as many days! It's Thanksgiving weekend and I have zero plans and I'm not too terribly concerned... For me, Thanksgiving exists in Edmonton and nowhere else. BUT, my Edmonton Thanksgiving table isn't doing so well. One JUST had a foot operation and has a horrible cough, another is undergoing cancer treatments, another had gallbladder surgery, and they all have been helping each other during this stressful time. My mom & co is in Vancouver.... So what's a girl to do? Collude with my ma and send over a pre-made Thanksgiving dinner to Gram's house, of course! We split the cost of a thanksgiving dinner including: roast chicken, mashed potatoes, corn, stuffing, gravy, rolls, and my cousin is baking a pie! While I don't usually have the funds to play Oprah, it wasn't terribly expensive, I had just finished rolling all of my coins, and I only paid for half thanks to my mom....so it wasn't a burden of any kind, and I'm jus...

Last week a friend sent me a few questions about some tourist spots in Madagscar because a friend of his is going there. I did a Google search...and then went through my blog and found the best posts. In general, Madagascar isn't such a great tourist destination because of lack of infrastructure/stability/development...but it was so nice to go through my blog....and read what I wrote way back when. It made me want to write about what goes on now. Except I already share too many photos of the dog on Facebook and Instagram :P.  There is something going on in my life....that I struggle with daily. Someone I love very much is struggling with cancer. They are going through treatment right now and will have surgery at some point...and I am praying so hard that this terrifying experience will be over then. Someone I love...through osmosis I guess (the spouse of someone close to me) is just beginning their cancer treatment. Here's the thing about treatment. I thought it was SO simple...

Sunday's Goat Post left me with this surreal feeling....like, am I really living in this big city...essentially alone... in a...job that isn't terribly exciting (but stable....and I'm all about creating stability - even if it seems terribly unattractive at the moment).. and all I can come up with - is that it's time to return to the expatriate life in a relatively stable/safe country in Africa. I get an email every other month or so....but always reply with a, "No thank you". It isn't the time for me to go yet. I have some family stuff that I want to see through. I'm dating someone that I don't want to break up with, nor do I want to marry and move him to Africa with me... But I want an escape. Since returning 4 years ago (but more like 3 years ago "officially" - that one year I was in Europe/Alberta/back to Madagascar/then Quebec), I have experienced more chaos than I could ever have expected. It has all been documented at some poi...

I am plagued....or blessed with the occasional urge to just be a complete idiot and do something fun, original, and unplanned. Although this specific event required a little bit of planning since I bought the tickets a few days in advance. But the idea kind of just flashed in my mind....I googled, and sure enough, Montreal had Goat Yoga - and they had it this weekend. Yes - Goat Yoga. Here's an article to read if you'd like to catch up on the fad Seriously. It's not a joke... City-slickers pay $30 (or more!!!) to have a yoga class, in a glorified barn, with baby goats (and in my case, two momma goats). The goats are encouraged to run all over the humans....who are not so much doing yoga as they are taking photos for their Instagram accounts. There's even a staff member on duty - on high alert for goat droppings. I arrived at the event, WHICH INCLUDED PARKING. This simply does not happen in Montreal. Especially downtown. I was beginning to think this was a...

I've been kind of a mess....or can we just say that I stay in a mess state - but with varying degrees? Someone I love very much is starting chemotherapy and radiation treatment today. I tried avoiding thinking about this for as long as I could.... the thought of what is essentially poison going into their veins....terrified me. But reality could wait no longer, so I called them and wished them well. Is it normal that the sick person seems more positive and empowered than those around them? I was amazed by their attitude and courage.....when I feel like falling apart and crying or having a massive panic attack. Anyway, they told me this little saying and it encouraged me and made me feel ridiculously proud to know someone so brave. But if you all could say a prayer for this person....and anyone going through a hard time. They need all the strength they can get.

I started my new job in Madagascar, EIGHT YEARS ago today. You can read about it here ....but there wasn't much to say. I was in shock. I remember everything so clearly....I thought I had an idea of what I was in for....I would never have guessed that those 4+ years would have changed my life so much. I learned how to re-live my life. I stepped way out of my comfort zone. My life will never be the same. Every two months or so....I get an email to see if I'm interested in another expat position....and the last email is still on my mind. Resident status, 49 vacation days, in Guinea. I will already know quite a few people there... But it's not my time. But I still feel....like I left my heart in Africa.....(but haven't written the country song to accompany it yet)...and my time in Africa is not over. It's just on hold for now. The first offer to expat life came in at the right time in my life. It was such a wonderful time...because I was ready for it. If I...