Jetlag jumble

So.

I’m scared to say write this. I could be tempting fate.

But today marks the 4th day in Madagascar and I have had ZERO. STOMACH. SICKNESS. Could it be? Could my stomach have decided to man up and like NOT get sick the moment I set foot here?

I’m having mega sinus pain but nothing that this liquid that you squirt up your nose won’t fix (um, no, not like liquid cocaine or anything. If there is such a thing).

So. Yeah. I’m back in Madagascar. Annnnnnnddddd I want to give all my money away.

Louis’ driver has to take fifteen days off work for a medical condition. He actually is contracted out through another company – and this company won’t pay for his time off. So…when Louis wasn’t looking I gave him 65 00 MGA ($32.50 CDN = 30% of his monthly salary). I knew that Louis would not appreciate/approve of me giving his driver money… but the driver has a family…and he won’t be paid for nearly half of a month’s salary…
However, handing out money like that tends to create a negative cycle. First, the driver can become dependent on the supplemental income. When I’m gone, so is the extra money. It can also lead to changing the economics of the country. Workers get more money, so staples – like rice - become more expensive. But non-project workers don’t make more money. So they can no longer afford simple things like rice, which leads to an increase of petty theft, and so forth.

I can’t save the world. I can’t give money to everyone. But. Its. So. Hard.

I donate every month to an orphanage down the road. I give the equivalent to $50 CDN…and often I wonder if half of it benefits the children. Then I think…even if 10% gets to the needs of the children….it’s 10% that they didn’t have before. I’ve contacted a few places to see if I can volunteer but no one is looking for volunteers on a Sunday (the only day off we have).

Yesterday Louis and I went into town for a quick grocery run. A little girl, maybe 12 years old and all of 50lbs asked if she could guard for our truck while we grocery shop. Louis obliged and we bought her a pastry and a juice box. I put the straw in the juice box for her and she ran off extremely happy and we watched her share her goodies with her family. I like doing things like that, but I’ve had experiences where I’m nearly mobbed when I hand out any kind of food. So I’m pretty careful about doing that. I try to be nice. To be appreciative. To speak Malagasy as much as I can. I don’t always succeed....

I don’t have a point. I’m just jet-lag-rambling. I have no idea if I’ll ever get used to the difference between incomes. I have no idea how long I’ll be in Madagascar.

A little tidbit of info about moi. When I’ve had a few too many drinks, I am a “I love you guys” kind of person. I will call you or text you and tell you that I like you so much and that I’m happy you’re my friend. I’m having the same kind of feeling today and think it’s a big jet-lag induced. So... I love Madagascar and what it’s done in my life (remind me of this when I'm having a bad day here....) I would so send it a text message right now, like when I'm a little tipsy.... It’s made me think of things in a different perspective. It’s been super hard. But it’s made me question….what I want out of life and how I’m going to live my life. I haven’t quite decided how or what exactly I want….other than to be happy and feel fulfilled with what I have. It’s pretty simplistic but a pretty tall order depending how you look at it.

Ok. Drunk “I love you, man” Mega jet-lag me signing off….

(Oh, and I totally confessed about my donation to Louis’ driver. He was less than impressed….but far from surprised…)