The Worst Kid
I won't even elaborate on my last post because I don't want to think about it. I have a plan and it's not the end of the world, and let's just move on.
While I've been on my studying sabbatical, I've been volunteering at a "Homework Help" after-school program, once per week from 16h00 to 18h00. I've actually been searching for a volunteer activity for some time, so I was thrilled to find one so close to home and so fun and rewarding.
It's not without its...challenging moments. I can be...a bit emotional (on the inside...never on the outside), when I work with a 7 year-old that can't remember how to sound out her words so she can't read (but I always have a solution for the next week).
It can be frustrating when I see that there's a little shit disturber bothering one or more students that are actually trying to work...and trying to discipline said shit-disturber in a calm, light, and reinforcing way - after all - I'm not his teacher, I'm not his parent, I'm....a glorified babysitter.
I remember splitting up what I was later told was "the worst student" in our program the in my second week of volunteering. I did so pretty calm, I wasn't angry, I just didn't want him bothering another child who was writing down all kinds of wrong answers while being distracted.
My first week with the "worst kid" went a little like this,
Me: Oh, hey, Joey, I'm Nicole. What are you working on today? (Plus some other get to know you chatter random crap).
Him: (while working on a scrap sheet of paper) Some math stuff.
Me: Oh? You don't have any homework?
Him: Nope. Finished it all.
Me: Oh! Cool, dude! (Except, this is all going down in French). But, can I see your binder where your teacher lists your homework?
Him - with MEGA attitude: OH!?! So you think I'm lying?!?
Me: Woah!!! Calm down. No, buddy, I'm new here and I can't figure how every different teacher has a different style of assigning homework. I'm trying to figure out all how it works... We don't get any training when we volunteer.
He reluctantly got out his binder, with all his assignments, and all of his work, and it was clear that he was very disorganized and not on top of his game, and probably had homework but I couldn't figure it out and had already spent enough time. I asked him some questions, but I couldn't seem to figure out what he actually had to do, and he was really distracting the other child, so they got separated. He was given a crossword puzzle (yeah.....rewarding negative behavior.....greeeeaatttt) and I worked with the other child to get him back on track (and we succeeded. The other child was practically jumping in his chair once he figured out that he actually knew the material!). I moved on with the rest of the kids. Joey got a cartoon to read until the end of the day.
Since I'm not there every day, I never know who I am going to see. This week, around 17h30, here's Joey, sitting at a table, solo, looking fairly frazzled.
Me: Hey, my favorite bud!
Him: ...Hey..
Me: Ok, don't get too excited to see me.
Him: Yeah. It's just that I always save things until the last minute and I have to finish this.
Me: Well, today's your lucky day, because I know that math sheet you're working on, and I went over it with another student last week. It's very simple, once you get the concept, and I know you know how to do it, just YOU might not know how to do it.
Him: Maybe....I just always leave things until the last minute!!
Me: Ok!! But you're here now? So you want to complain or work?
I take a few minutes to explain the concept and go through 3 examples with him, and then let him do three more, asking him to explain each answer. SHOCKER - he knows this stuff down pat. I checked on him every so often....and he's getting all of the right answers
Out of the corner of my eye, I see a a man kind of watching us, I knew he was a parent, I just didn't know he was Joey's dad. There are parents everywhere - nothing new.
A few more minutes went by and the library lights flashed on and off - the library was closing. Joey had two more questions to complete. Not only had he learned the concept, but he was going to finish his worksheet! Ok, so the little kid left it until the last minute, but, I didn't spend more time with him that I would have spent with any other child (some nights we are with up to 10 kids each!) and I helped him see that he IS capable!
We were packing up and his dad (the man that was watching us) came over. He must have thanked me three times, and then finally shook my hand, thanking me a final time.
So...the "worst kid". Really? I'm sure he can act like the worst kid. He can have a big attitude. But the worst kid????
He certainly needs something. Rules. Consequences. Our education system isn't set up to deal with him because he probably gets good enough marks and doesn't cause too much trouble...
I'm not a teacher. I don't know anything about his home life. I've known him for a very short period of time. But I've stayed consistent. I've given him consistent attention and caring and feedback. It hasn't been easy because he's pushed back a lot... (Insert me feeling very old when I said, "You don't make the rules around here, Joey!!!). But he finished his homework....when he thought it was impossible. He thought he didn't understand it. He left feeling confident. He thanked me and gave me a high five. What a horrible kid.
It made my evening. It makes me feel like I'm making a difference every. single. time I go.
While I've been on my studying sabbatical, I've been volunteering at a "Homework Help" after-school program, once per week from 16h00 to 18h00. I've actually been searching for a volunteer activity for some time, so I was thrilled to find one so close to home and so fun and rewarding.
It's not without its...challenging moments. I can be...a bit emotional (on the inside...never on the outside), when I work with a 7 year-old that can't remember how to sound out her words so she can't read (but I always have a solution for the next week).
It can be frustrating when I see that there's a little shit disturber bothering one or more students that are actually trying to work...and trying to discipline said shit-disturber in a calm, light, and reinforcing way - after all - I'm not his teacher, I'm not his parent, I'm....a glorified babysitter.
I remember splitting up what I was later told was "the worst student" in our program the in my second week of volunteering. I did so pretty calm, I wasn't angry, I just didn't want him bothering another child who was writing down all kinds of wrong answers while being distracted.
My first week with the "worst kid" went a little like this,
Me: Oh, hey, Joey, I'm Nicole. What are you working on today? (Plus some other get to know you chatter random crap).
Him: (while working on a scrap sheet of paper) Some math stuff.
Me: Oh? You don't have any homework?
Him: Nope. Finished it all.
Me: Oh! Cool, dude! (Except, this is all going down in French). But, can I see your binder where your teacher lists your homework?
Him - with MEGA attitude: OH!?! So you think I'm lying?!?
Me: Woah!!! Calm down. No, buddy, I'm new here and I can't figure how every different teacher has a different style of assigning homework. I'm trying to figure out all how it works... We don't get any training when we volunteer.
He reluctantly got out his binder, with all his assignments, and all of his work, and it was clear that he was very disorganized and not on top of his game, and probably had homework but I couldn't figure it out and had already spent enough time. I asked him some questions, but I couldn't seem to figure out what he actually had to do, and he was really distracting the other child, so they got separated. He was given a crossword puzzle (yeah.....rewarding negative behavior.....greeeeaatttt) and I worked with the other child to get him back on track (and we succeeded. The other child was practically jumping in his chair once he figured out that he actually knew the material!). I moved on with the rest of the kids. Joey got a cartoon to read until the end of the day.
Since I'm not there every day, I never know who I am going to see. This week, around 17h30, here's Joey, sitting at a table, solo, looking fairly frazzled.
Me: Hey, my favorite bud!
Him: ...Hey..
Me: Ok, don't get too excited to see me.
Him: Yeah. It's just that I always save things until the last minute and I have to finish this.
Me: Well, today's your lucky day, because I know that math sheet you're working on, and I went over it with another student last week. It's very simple, once you get the concept, and I know you know how to do it, just YOU might not know how to do it.
Him: Maybe....I just always leave things until the last minute!!
Me: Ok!! But you're here now? So you want to complain or work?
I take a few minutes to explain the concept and go through 3 examples with him, and then let him do three more, asking him to explain each answer. SHOCKER - he knows this stuff down pat. I checked on him every so often....and he's getting all of the right answers
Out of the corner of my eye, I see a a man kind of watching us, I knew he was a parent, I just didn't know he was Joey's dad. There are parents everywhere - nothing new.
A few more minutes went by and the library lights flashed on and off - the library was closing. Joey had two more questions to complete. Not only had he learned the concept, but he was going to finish his worksheet! Ok, so the little kid left it until the last minute, but, I didn't spend more time with him that I would have spent with any other child (some nights we are with up to 10 kids each!) and I helped him see that he IS capable!
We were packing up and his dad (the man that was watching us) came over. He must have thanked me three times, and then finally shook my hand, thanking me a final time.
So...the "worst kid". Really? I'm sure he can act like the worst kid. He can have a big attitude. But the worst kid????
He certainly needs something. Rules. Consequences. Our education system isn't set up to deal with him because he probably gets good enough marks and doesn't cause too much trouble...
I'm not a teacher. I don't know anything about his home life. I've known him for a very short period of time. But I've stayed consistent. I've given him consistent attention and caring and feedback. It hasn't been easy because he's pushed back a lot... (Insert me feeling very old when I said, "You don't make the rules around here, Joey!!!). But he finished his homework....when he thought it was impossible. He thought he didn't understand it. He left feeling confident. He thanked me and gave me a high five. What a horrible kid.
It made my evening. It makes me feel like I'm making a difference every. single. time I go.
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