Friends forever....or not?

Every few weeks I log onto Google Analytics and see just who is reading my blog. I think I know most of the readers from Canada, US, and Australia... but the readers from Exeter, Paris, Johannesburg, and Moscow?!? Don’t know you guys, but I think it's super cool that you read my blog and you don’t even know me. I feel like some kind of celebrity or something!!! (Just kidding…)

I get the odd email comment or question...and what I wonder sometimes is...why I don't get emails/comments asking me about...THE OBVIOUS!?!? Like…I’m a SINGLE girl living in a world made up of about…95% of guys. No one has ever asked me about my romantic life. This kind of surprises me?!

Or…is it because I’m such a big mouth that you all already know about it? Either I've told you or I'm so obvious in my writing that it's just a well known fact?

If so, then it would come as no surprise that *gasp* I dated someone here. OMG!!! The important details: We were friends, we had a connection, we dated (even took a trip together!!) and then broke up. Such is…well…the dating life. I think it’s pretty common.

(And maybe…it’s even possible that I’ll date again?!?! OH!! The suspense, I know!!!)

The relationship was pretty short...and what I was most upset about is that the FRIENDSHIP was over. I could totally deal with the relationship being over...but losing a friend? Over a short relationship? Cómo?

I don’t totally understand (perhaps it’s because I’m a crazy girl) is why people that date can’t be friends after. Unless there was some horrible crime or adultery committed…why shouldn’t there be some type of a friendship after? It’s just the romantic junk that’s changed…nothing else really? Ya don't have to be best buds or anything...but...why not friends? And at the bare minimum...you should be able to share a cup of coffee with minimal awkwardness. No?

What doesn’t help, in my case, is to have to live AND work with an ex. Not only does this create some potentially awkward moments, but it adds another layer of…pressure to be civil to one another. Like, really….Do ya really wanna to be fighting with your neighbour? (Um... a certain love thy neighbour quote should be interpreted very carefully in this situation…)

To continue on with my lack of understanding….if you dated a person and treated them respectfully during the relationship, why would this change after the relationship? Does the other person deserve less respect and consideration post-relationship compared to during the relationship? To bring back an expression of the 90's...What gives?! You are both the exact same people that went into the relationship; y’all just don’t want to be with each other anymore.

It sounds sooo simple. And simplest things are always the hardest to do....

Okay, so you don’t have to even like them anymore. And okay…maybe the sight of them brings back too many sad/good/bad memories.

But why do people get so hostile and crazy after a breakup? Why can’t we all just get along?

Don’t people realize how much ENERGY fighting takes?!?

Maybe it’s because I’m an only child…and not used to fighting…
Or...maybe it's that the only true thing that I KNOW in my advanced age of THIRTY (ahhh!!!) is that Life… is just too short. Especially for fighting. Triple especially for fighting in the expat world. We already have to fight soooo much just to achieve the simplest task (perhaps…getting to work!??). In addition, we are constantly fighting the remoteness of our environment, the language barriers, the lack of knowledge about the culture or the way that things are supposed to be done, why the hell would we fight about…nothing important?

I’m not so clueless as to ignore the fact that there are probably less overt issues that exist and cause this behaviour…but isn’t it worth putting them aside? To me...it all just makes....logical sense. Perhaps I'm thinking too much like an accountant..(or just lazy...since it seems like the easiest thing to do...) but come on... why not just freaking get along with your ex-friend?

This little rant isn’t specific to me being an expat…but it’s something I went through in the last couple of months. I have my list of reasons for keeping my relationship off “the blog”…as well as the breakup (and they aren’t worth getting in to right now)... but figured I could write about it now, since it's all over and done with.

Also...I haven’t had a post in a while so figured I’d post a random ramble so that the readers in Exeter and Moscow know I’m still out there ….thanks (to everyone) for continuing to read my rambles… I’m sure I’ll have more interesting junk to post about when I’m back to my “real life” in MG instead of spending my days sleeping, shopping and getting pedicures…