Instruction Manual

I’m really tired, and when I’m really tired I’m partial to moodiness, crankiness (maybe that’s the same thing?), and just general weirdness.

Sometimes I’m not quite sure how to handle a working situation like this. I feel like my down time is becoming less and less. Should I continue with this expatriate lifestyle, I think I need to seriously consider becoming residential and not rotational. Yes, it means less holidays (like more than half!!!) but I might get a better quality of life.

 

 

Residents work hours are 8h00 to 17h00, Monday to Friday, and they get all national holidays off (I think there are at LEAST twelve during the year).

This would also mean that I don’t get to have all over the world holidays. Or if I do…it means that I pay for them myself. Which isn’t the end of the world.

 

 

I took the option to work 6h30 to 18h30 instead of 7h00 to 19h00 (and actually fought for it!) so that I can get a run in a few times a week, but I’m still adapting to it.

 

 

I’m just tired of being tired. Tired of hurrying so that I can go to bed so that I don’t feel tired the next morning.

 

 

The project has changed a lot. When I first came, it was party/social central. Everyone wanted to hang out together and there was always something going on. There still are things going on, but it’s just different. The people that got here a couple of years ago have changed along the way just like I have too. I had my year and a bit of mega partying, and although that wasn’t sustainable, I feel like it’s dropped off to almost nothing. We still go by the pool or go sailing and have fun, but I don’t have the energy to get together with people like I used to.

 

 

And I value my “own” time SO much. Like SO much. Yesterday I had a work supper and I was beyond annoyed. It’s not that I didn’t enjoy the fun, or the company (actually, I think I made a new friend), but it was the fact that I HAD to do something. My day is all about “have tos”

Have to wake up at 5h05

Have to leave the house at 5h50

Have to finish eating by 6h20

Have to be at work by 6h30

Have to take lunch/be back at work at 12h00/13h00

Have to stay until 18h30

Have to run Monday, Wednesday, Friday (running three times a week almost never actually happens!)

Have to get to bed before 22h00 so that I’m not exhausted during the day.

That leaves me roughly an hour and a half every evening to myself.

In this hour and a half, I have to get everything ready for the next morning, have a shower, and then watch a tv show or to and then go to bed.

I could totally go out for supper with friends, but I don’t think to set anything up.

I could totally go for tennis lessons like I did a few times, but again, I forget or just don’t feel like it at the end of the day.

I could totally go out dancing Saturday night, but 95% of the time, I’m just waiting for the moment my head touches the pillow.

I realize that this probably sounds like a Oh, poor me post. I’m not complaining. Ok, scratch that. I’m totally complaining but more just to get my thoughts out rather than looking for any kind of sympathy. This job is the most amazing opportunity I’ve had in my life and I am more than grateful for it. I just wish I felt more balanced. And I’d like a few more hours in the day. I’m sure next week I’ll be all about laughing at some kind of poop joke, but this week I just feel like I’m struggling.

Luckily, today I found some helpful instructions. :)